


I'm Always Here

by Astrangefan



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Andromeda is amazing, Character Death, Christmas, Hermione and Draco are together, Not a child death, Snow Globe, lots of love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:01:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28304973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Astrangefan/pseuds/Astrangefan
Summary: Memories of past Christmases bring Hermione and Draco closer. The present changes them and their family forever.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy
Comments: 16
Kudos: 48





	I'm Always Here

**Author's Note:**

> This is my second story ever and my first Dramione. I was trying to aim for Twistmas 2020, but I was having a rough time nailing down the prompt which is Snow Globe. I have to give HeyJude19 a shout out for her "Nutcracker Pas de Deux" for finally providing me with some guidance. Her portrayal of Scorpius made me want to write Scorpius. He is adorable. 
> 
> So, once I decided I need Scorpius in my story, the rest of it fell into place. I wrote it between 10:00 pm last night until 2:00 am this morning. 
> 
> I have to give huge credit to youcanttouchthis for her wonderful beta skills and her overall advice. It's because of her that this story is not riddled with typos, tense shifts, and timelines that don't make sense. 
> 
> This is sad, but still hopeful and I hope meaningful for anyone who believes in signs.

_February, 2010_

The skies were a brilliant and cloudless blue. A hint of spring was in the air. Birds were chirping in the trees.

Hermione was impervious to all of that. In a daze, she held Callie on her lap and took Scorpius’ hand. As Draco predicted, Callie was the spitting image of her. Harry stood next to Scorpius and held his other hand. There was a soft murmuring behind her, but it floated over her head. Anytime someone tried to approach her, Harry would catch their eye and shake his head.

Scorpius was a lively six-year-old with curly blond hair, who, despite his cherubic face, had a hard time sitting still. Today, however, he instinctively knew that he needed to be quiet and try to distract his little sister. He didn’t quite understand why all these people were there. His mum didn’t want to talk to any of them and Uncle Harry made sure no one tried.

He knew it had something to do with Daddy not being there. Mum told him that Daddy got sick and none of the healers could help him and he did something called dying. It meant he was never going to see him again and he was sad. She also told him that Callie didn’t understand anything that was going on and whenever she cried for Daddy that he needed to be a big brother and try to distract her with his funny jokes. She told him he was just like Daddy; he could make people laugh. He didn’t know what was so funny, he just thought some things were really stupid and didn’t hesitate to call it out. Apparently, Daddy did that too, when he was younger.

He tugged on Hermione’s sleeve. “Mummy? Are we going to eat soon? I’m getting hungry.” He had a bowl of cereal that morning, but it wasn’t enough. The elves were all sniffling and forgetting things, like toast and orange juice.

“Sweetheart, we’ll go to lunch as soon as we’re done here.” Hermione could barely put two words together, but she had a soft smile for her oldest child. She knew this was tough and that he didn’t understand everything that happened. She just wanted everything to be done and all the people to leave her alone in her grief. Then, maybe, she could talk to Scorpius and help him understand the loss of his father. If one more well-meaning person tried to tell him that his dad was just sleeping, she was not going to be responsible for her magic.

Four days ago, Draco was fine, just had a little headache, he said. The next day, he could barely get out of bed. He felt like his head was splitting open, he said, and then he collapsed. By nightfall she had floo’d him to St. Mungo’s. After numerous tests and even talking to a Muggle neurosurgeon who was married to a Muggleborn, everything pointed to an aneurysm. She still couldn’t wrap her head around how something so small as a blood clot the size of a fairy wing could kill someone.

She stayed by his bed while he was still conscious and when he lapsed into unconsciousness, she crawled in beside him. She held his hand and talked with him, knowing that he couldn’t hear her and probably never would again. It was 8 am when his heart stopped beating. She jolted awake and was unconsolable when she realized he left her while she slept. Harry came and he did his best to assure her that Draco knew she was there and that her assurances that they would be alright helped him transition.

Now she was here. At a graveside memorial service that Pureblood society insisted she, as the widow, arrange. She did not want to do it and told anyone who would listen. All she wanted to do was crawl into her bed, pull her children close to her and never leave. Why the hell she had to go through this ceremony was beyond her. If he had been there, Draco would have kept up a constant commentary in her ear about each matron and long in the tooth lord and who was banging who and for how long.

Finally, the ceremony ended. She took the children into the Manor with her, handed them off to Harry and Ginny and excused herself for a minute. She went upstairs to the suite of rooms they used when they weren’t in London and threw herself on the bed. 

_December, 2000 (9 years earlier)_

“Hey, Draco,” Hermione called him from the living room where she was unpacking Christmas decorations. They had moved in together six months ago and this would be their first Christmas together. They were immersed in the unenviable task of going through and trying to combine their decorations. It wasn’t hard to tell them apart. Draco’s were sleek looking and expensive and would have turned their tree from a traditional holiday decoration to an artistic statement worthy of the cover of Witch Weekly. Hermione’s were simple, homemade and gave her great joy. The ensuing discussion of what to keep and what to discard was perilously close to escalating to a fight. Not their first and certainly not their last.

“Yes?” Draco appeared behind her with two glasses of firewhisky. Hermione turned around and raised an eyebrow.

“Fortification?” She smirked as she took the one he offered her.

“Peace offering. I promise I won’t sneer at your homey decorations, ah ah ah…” He put a hand up to stay Hermione’s indignant protest. “And….you won’t say anything about my beautiful, classic….completely over the top and disgustingly expensive, not to mention, somewhat tacky….” He was interrupted by a very enthusiastic kiss.

“Good answer.” Hermione pulled back and looked up at him. “I hate arguing with you.” She took her drink and went back to the box she was working on.

“Because, you know you’ll lose?” Draco chuckled and sipped his drink.

“Uh, no. Because you lay everything out logically and I hate it because that’s what I would do. You always beat me to it!” She started pulling tissue paper out of the box.

“So, because you know you’ll lose.” He finished his drink and peered over her shoulder to see what she was doing. “That’s one of my boxes, isn’t it?”

“Yes. I’m looking for more of those snakeskin wreaths.” She pulled out a small, wrapped object. “Let me guess. A candle that shoots out green and silver sparkles.” She started to unwrap it. As the tissue fell from her hands, Draco reached out his hand and stopped her.

“Wait a minute, where did that come from?” The object was a snow globe. “Merlin, I didn’t know that still existed.” He took it gently from Hermione and shook it. He looked at the bottom and wound the key. It began to play “Deck the Halls” and things started to move inside.

“A snow globe? Draco, I didn’t know the wizarding world knew about these. We decorated our mantel every year with my mother’s Christmas collection of snow globes. What’s inside?” She looks at it closely and gasps. “It’s Hogwarts!”

When the little snowflakes cleared, a miniature version of Hogwarts appeared out of the mist. Intricate in detail, it was the castle in the winter and decorated for Christmas. There were candles in the windows and wreaths on the doors and little figures looked like they were skating in the courtyard. After a few seconds, the music stopped and the candles went out. Draco shook it again and the candles lit up once more.

“My mother gave this to me when I was six years old. Every year we would get it out of the box and I would ask her if I was old enough to go to Hogwarts yet, and every year she would say, ‘All in good time, darling, all in good time.’ He kept turning it around looking at it with a growing sense of awe.

“Why didn’t you think it still existed? It was in your box of decorations.” Hermione took the snow globe from Draco and wound it up so the music would start playing again.

“I’m not sure. I remember the last time I saw it, though. I was 16. We had gotten all the decorations out for the house elves to organize. I had just pulled it out and my mother took it from me and told me we weren’t putting it out this year. The Dark Lo… Voldemort,” he stuttered, “had just moved in and I remember my mother taking it from me and said ‘no, Draco, not this one. Something in this house has to stay pure and unsullied.’ Then she did something with it and I never saw it again.”

Hermione turned the snow globe upside down and peered at the bottom. “Draco, there’s something written here.” She pointed to the faded writing, but Draco didn’t even look at it.

_To my Dragon, soon this will be another place to call home. Love, Mother_

He looked out the window as he recited the inscription from memory. “Excuse me.” Draco left the room and went upstairs.

Hermione held the snow globe in one hand and wiped the tears away with the other. _Narcissa must have slipped this in here when Draco was moving out._ _It’s too bad she didn’t attach a note to it, but I guess she knew he would recognize it. I wish she was here right now; he needs her._

But Narcissa had died a year before they moved in together.. Healers discovered an inoperable brain tumor and they told Draco to make her comfortable at home. It was a heart wrenching time. Draco stayed with her until she passed, taking care of her until her last moments. He had lost his last parent (batshit crazy Lucius in Azkaban didn’t count) and did not connect with Andromeda until the funeral. She helped Draco immensely, telling him stories about the Black sisters’s childhood, life at Hogwarts, everything she could think of up until life as she knew it imploded when she eloped with Ted Tonks. 

Hermione looked around the room, trying to determine the best spot to display it. Her gaze landed on the mantel and a smile slowly appeared on her face. _This will take two traditions and make them one._

_***_

About 30 minutes later, Draco reappeared, eyes red, but calm. Hermione looked up at him as he gazed around the room and spotted the snow globe on the mantel. He walked over to it and touched it reverently. With a heavy sigh, he turned to Hermione.

“I like it. Thank you.” He walked over to her and she held out her arms to him. He enveloped her in a hug and kissed the top of her head. Hermione ran her hands up and down his back, comforting him. “I love you.”

“You have no idea how much I love you,” Draco whispered into her hair. “You saved me, you know?” He pulled back from her, looked directly in her eyes and cradled her cheeks in his hands. “You took me, a selfish, arrogant, snotty prat with the biggest head in the world and kept me from being an even more selfish, arrogant and snotty prat. I will always be in your debt, love.”

“None of that,” Hermione put her finger on his lips. “We helped each other out of a hole that threatened to swallow us whole. I was an insecure, socially-deficient girl with big hair and an even bigger brain and you taught me that I could be confident without competing, friendly without smothering _and_ learn to say no.” Before he could protest, she kissed him.

When they broke apart, Hermione’s eyes lit up with an idea.

“Uh oh, I know that look. You’re about to tell me something I’m not sure I want to hear.” Draco walked over to the study, grabbed the bottle of whisky. “Am I going to need this?”

“No, no, no. I just thought that if, no... _when_ we have a boy, because you know we’re getting married and having the standard 2.5 children plus pets, you should pass this down to him on his sixth Christmas.”

“2.5 children? I do need this.” Draco unscrewed the cap and took a swig directly from the bottle.

“Draco!! It’s just a Muggle expression. The average number of children per household in Muggle Britain is 2.5. You’ve missed the entire point of my idea.” She rolled her eyes.

He laughed. “No, I got it. If…all right, when we do have children, if we have a boy I will gift it to him. What do we do if we have a girl? Even though that’s not going to happen because…”

“Malfoys only have boys. Yes, yes, I know that. But you never know. She winked at him. Wel, jewelry is always nice.” 

“Or a book? Since we all know she’s going to be just like you.” Draco ducked out of the way as a pillow sailed past him. “What?! Our son will be on the Slytherin Quidditch team and our daughter will take 10 classes every year and graduate when she’s 15 because by then there won’t be any more classes left for her to take.”

“Whatever,” Hermione huffed. “C’mon. We need to get back to this mess or we’ll still have boxes all over the place on Christmas.”

They continued working their way through the boxes, each one “admiring” the other’s possessions in order to keep an easy détente. Once they were done, Draco vanished the boxes and pulled Hermione upstairs.

_June, 2003 (7 years earlier)_

Draco and Hermione were wed 18 months later and Scorpius came along a little less than nine months from their wedding. After they came home from the hospital, stunned that they were allowed to leave with their newborn, they adjusted to having a screaming newborn and slowly settled into a routine.

On this, their first anniversary, Draco had dinner ready when Hermione got home. Because his work with Malfoy Enterprises was more flexible and he could basically work anywhere, he stayed home with Scorpius. Well, Scorpius and the elves. Elves who refused to let Draco do anything that had to do with taking care of the baby. They said it was their job to deal with the messes and his job to introduce him to the wonderful things life had to offer. So, finding himself with time on his hands, he (and the elves) had a candlelit dinner ready on their terrace. He greeted her at the floo with a glass of champagne and a cracker spread with one of her favorite appetizers, spinach artichoke dip.

“What is this?” Hermione accepted the glass as he took her coat and satchel. “Did I miss something?” Her eyes were sparkling with mischief.

“Can’t I greet my wife and the mother of my child every once in a while with expensive champagne?” Draco pretended to look hurt.

“Yes, when it’s to celebrate the happiest day of her life.” She kissed him and took the cracker.

“I prefer to call it the day I got my wife pregnant with the Malfoy heir.” He sniffed aristocratically and turned to walk to the kitchen not seeing the shoe before it hit him square in the middle of his back.

“Hey!” He almost did a spit take with the champagne. He whipped around to see Hermione with the other shoe in her hand ready to let it fly.

“And if you ever want to even _try_ for another one, you’re gonna have to do better than that.” She laughed as she walked towards him.

“You just try to keep me away!” He pulled her to him roughly and kissed her soundly. She opened her mouth at the same time he did and they briefly forgot where they were, what time it was and that they were both holding Waterford crystal champagne glasses.

Once they came back down to earth, Draco took her hand and led her to the terrace. She stopped in mid stride to take in the setting. A table for two was set with china, silver and crystal. In the middle was a stunning arrangement of flowers in a vase. To the side was a veritable buffet of dishes all under stasis charms keeping them warm.

“Oh Draco, it’s beautiful. Did you do all this?” She walks towards the table. “And these flowers? Are they from my bouquet? How did you….?” She looks at him like a child seeing Santa for the first time.

“One. Yes, I did.” A polite ‘ahem’ drew their attention back to the doorway. Standing in waiter’s garb was Freddie, their house elf. Draco cleared his throat, a little chagrined.

“Well, we did.” Another ‘ahem’ and this time Freddie had his hands on his hips and was tapping his foot, looking not a little bit like Professor McGonagall. “OK, you did all of it. But I supervised, so there.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, sir. Whatever helps.” Freddie busied himself pulling out Hermione’s chair. “Ma’am?”

Hermione shook her head in amusement. First of all, she did not feel old enough to be a ma’am and secondly, try as she might she could not get any of the elves to address her by her first name. It never ceased to amaze her. She sat down and put her napkin on her lap.

“Thank you, Freddie. Everything looks perfect. Draco supervised you well.” She winked at him and Freddie blushed.

“Freddie, give us about 15 minutes to get settled, please.” Draco shoo’d him away and sat down himself. “Where was I? Oh, yes. To answer your question about the flowers – let’s just say that when you thought my eyes were glazing over with all the decisions we had to make last year, I was actually paying some attention. Now let’s move them off the table so I can look at my beautiful bride.”

“Well, you have outdone yourself, sweetheart. And you managed to delightfully surprise me, even though you know I hate surprises. I’m so lucky you’re all mine.” Hermione grabbed his hand and kissed his palm.

“What kind of husband would I be if I couldn’t pull at least one thing over on you? Although you do make it difficult sometimes.” Draco laughed.

Dinner was served and the rest of the meal passed with conversation about her day, Scorpius’ latest exploits and Draco’s inability to keep him from climbing on everything. He was about a month away from walking, but his climbing skills were becoming legendary among their friends.

Once dinner was over, Freddie came to the doorway and got Draco’s attention.

“Excuse me, for just a minute. Freddie needs me for something.” Hermione and Freddie rolled their eyes in stereo. “Oh, shut it!” He glared at both of them.

He left the terrace and Hermione reflected on how perfect everything was. Dinner was a dream, dessert was waiting and Scorpius, Merlin love him, was at Harry and Ginny’s giving them heart attacks for the night. _We so deserve to be happy, after everything,_ she thought.

Draco returned, holding a plate with something on it that looked a little like a cake. Freddie vanished the dinner dishes and laid dessert plates out.

Hermione took one look at what was in Draco’s hands and said, “Whatever is _that_?” She peered a little closer. “Is that…wedding cake?” She looked up at Draco, in disbelief.

“Well, you were telling me all of these Muggle wedding traditions, and I remembered the one about eating wedding cake on the first anniversary, so I had the elves keep the top of the cake fresh for us to have tonight. I have been assured that it is perfectly all right to eat, even if it looks a little worse for wear.”

At that, Hermione’s eyes misted. She couldn’t believe everything he had done for her. The only thing she had done for him was a new quill from an extremely rare bird. “What did I do to deserve you?” She wiped under her eyelashes in an attempt to stem the tears that threatened.

“I should be saying that to you, darling. You are my everything, and I plan to keep showing you that until the day you die.” This time he grabbed her hand and kissed the top of it. “Now let’s see if they were telling the truth about this cake.” And he started cutting the cake.

Later, they moved from their place on the terrace to the living room. Draco brought over the remaining champagne and their glasses and set them on the coffee table. He stepped into the study and came back out with a small box. In the meantime, Hermione scurried to the foyer and pulled a long box out of the coat closet. They met back at the coffee table.

“Well, great minds…” Hermione laughed when she saw Draco’s package. She hadn’t even thought he would get her something, especially after the dinner they had just had.

After they settled, Hermione said, “You first.” She handed him the box. “Now I know you don’t have this, but….” Draco stopped her with a kiss.

“Stop. I love everything you have ever gotten me. But truly, you didn’t need to.” He opened the box and pulled away the paper. His jaw dropped when he saw what was nestled there. He gingerly picked up the quill out of the box and twirled it lovingly in his fingers. “Is this…how did you? Oh, Hermione, it’s beautiful.” He looked at it like it was the Holy Grail.

“Well, it’s from this extremely rare bird called the Werewolf Hawk that only lives on Madagascar and won’t let anybody touch him except for this “bird whisperer” and even he can only get about three quills at a time during a full moon. Hence, the name.” She looked shyly at him. “So….do you like it?

Draco stopped twirling the quill and looked at Hermione. “Oh, babe, it’s absolutely unbelievable. Of course, I love it. I will use it every time I have to sign something. Don’t worry.” He laughed at her look. “I have lots of things to sign. Always. It will get used. Now come here.” He reached over to her, put his hand behind her neck and drew her in for a slow, sweet kiss that made Hermione tingle all over. “Now it’s your turn.”

He handed her the box he was holding and she delicately untied the ribbon and peeked inside. Nestled in between layers of cotton was a necklace. The chain was the most delicate gold Hermione had ever seen and at the bottom was a pendant with a stone in the center. “Is that a blue sapphire? My birthstone?” She looked up at him in awe.

“Yes. I can’t say it came from a semi-extinct sapphire mine in Equatorial Africa, but it took a little searching.” He looked at her with nothing but love in his eyes.

“Oh Draco. It’s incredibly beautiful. You really shouldn’t have. But, thank you so much. I love you more than anything.” She kissed him just as slowly as he kissed her. “Except, of course, for Scorpius.” She giggled.

Draco tried to look affronted. Then he laughed. “At least you didn’t say Harry or Weasley.”

Hermione laughed. “Well, they are 4th and 5th in line.”

“Wait, not 3rd and 4th?” He looked at her, puzzled. Then, his eyes grew wide and his hand flew up to his mouth in shock. “What? Are you kidding? You’re kidding right? But you’re drinking champagne!”

“No, I’m not kidding. I just happened to have my annual check up today and the Healer found it during his exam. I’m barely six weeks, so he said I could have a couple sips tonight because of it being our first anniversary. You’ll notice that you didn’t have to refill my glass. We are due around March 15th. So at least, their birthdays will be in different months.” Scorpius had surprised them all and came three weeks early at the end of February.

“Oh, Hermione. This is incredible. Do you know that last time a Malfoy had more than one child?”

“465 years, darling. Don’t roll your eyes at me, you knew I would look that up sometime. Yes, we will be even more notorious than we are now.”

“Oh, before I forget, turn over the pendant.” He held the sapphire in his hand and gave it back to her.

“Oh, OK.” She squinted and tried to make out the inscription. Once she read it, she broke down.

“Hey, hey, I didn’t mean for you to cry.” Draco wrapped his arms around her. “It’s the truth, you know?”

She nodded and kept crying.

Once she had calmed down, she pulled away and looked at the necklace again. The back of the gold disk holding the sapphire was engraved.

_Never forget, you are loved no matter what. DM_

“But the words, how you phrased it. That was my fear my whole life. That if I didn’t make myself indispensable, no one would love me.” She tried to stop from falling apart again. Draco just held her, murmuring assurances and caressing her hair and her back.

Hermione finally pulled away and wiped her hand on Draco’s shoulder. “I got snot on your shirt.” She sniffled.

“Well, it’s a good thing I’m a wizard then, isn’t it?” Draco did a _Scourgify_ on his shoulder and it returned to its pristine condition. “Works for spit up and pee, too.” She laughed at the image he presented. 

“All you have to do is say one little quip and you always manage to pull me out of whatever spiral I’m in. I so love you for that.” She leans her cheek against his.

“So.” Draco cleared his throat. “Remember what you said about having a daughter? This necklace has a twofold purpose. When the time is right, we can give our daughter this necklace, that way Scorpius will have the snow globe and she will have the necklace. They will always have a piece of us.” He looks at her again. “Please don’t cry, love.”

Hermione shakes her head. “I think I’m all cried out. But that is such a beautiful idea. And if I recall, I did say jewelry works, didn’t I?”

“Uh, I believe it was ‘Let’s see, jewelry’s always nice.’” He looks at her smugly.

“Prat. I will never believe that you don’t listen to me, ever again. Turn around." Hermione turned her back to him and held up her hair. Draco carefully fasten the necklace at the back of her neck and nuzzled her ear.

“Can I listen to you some more in bed? Between Scorpius and morning sickness, it may be awhile before we get to enjoy ourselves again.” He took Hermione’s hands and pulled her up. She threw her arms around him and in one move he picked her up bridal style.

“Take me to bed, my Slytherin prince.”

_February, 2010 (present)_

The service was a kind of boundary line. Before it, she had so many things to take care of, even with Harry and Ginny and Andromeda’s help. There were legal and financial things to take care of, what to do for the service, all the while trying to be a stable source of comfort for Scorpius and Callie. The two of them were tossing around like unmoored boats that lost their anchor, and it just broke her heart. Callie just kept crying for Draco and Scorpius was trying to be strong, but Merlin love him, he didn’t really know what he was being strong for.

Was this what the rest of her life was going to look like? And seemed to stretch out endlessly before her. An unbroken line of should dos and have tos and don’t want tos but have to anyway. The realization was crashing down on her and she felt like she couldn’t breathe. There was no joy. From her standpoint she just could see no joy.

 _What am I going to do? How am I going to do it? How am I going to go on without you?_ She cried into Draco’s pillow, burying herself in his scent.

There was a soft knock at the door and, thinking it might be someone with one of the children, she said, “Come in.”

Andromeda slipped in and shut the door quietly. “Hermione?”

Hermione quickly sat up and tried to wipe the tears off her face without ruining her makeup.

“Oh, love, you don’t have to worry about that.” Andromeda sat down on the bed next to her and put her arm around her. “Everyone knows you’re up here and as long as they are being wined and dined with Malfoy food and drink, they are perfectly fine. I wanted to see how _you_ were doing?”

“How should I be doing? Is there a certain way I should be? Huh, Andromeda? Do I have the right attitude? The right amount of sadness? Am I grieving properly?” Hermione couldn’t help herself. She was tired of having to maintain the wall she had been hiding behind. It was starting to crumble and she didn’t have the strength to piece it back together.

Andromeda took it in stride. She had been there, done that. Luckily, while she hadn’t had to worry about protocol, she had seen enough growing up in a Pureblood household to know what Hermione was talking about.

“To hell with them.” Hermione looked at Andromeda, struck dumb at her pronouncement. She had never heard her use a swear word the whole time she had known her.

“Most of them have no idea what it’s like to lose someone so young. They are trying to fit you into their version of what grief looks like and they can’t. They are selfish, spineless aristocrats who have to cling to their beliefs and their rituals because if they didn’t they would see that they are just shells.” She paused for a moment. “Narcissa had three miscarriages before Draco was born and one more after, did you know that?” Andromeda needed to make sure Hermione fully understood how Pureblood society would be unrelenting if she didn’t take steps to curb it.

“No, I had no idea. Draco never told me. No wonder she spoiled him.” Hermione was not surprised Draco had never told her.

“Draco didn’t know. Lucius and Narcissa _never_ talked about it. After the first one, people kept coming up to them and saying ‘It will be ok, you’ll have other babies, you’re so young.’ And after Draco was born? Then they said ‘Well, thank Merlin for Draco. At least you have him.’ So they just shut the door on that part of their life and never spoke of it again.” 

Hermione let out a sigh of resignation.

“So what do I do? I just want them to leave us alone and let us deal with this in our own way. They come up to me and say ‘You must be so devastated.’ I just want to come back at them with ‘Of course, I’m devastated. Wouldn’t you be? I just lost the love of my life and the father of my children. So “f” off’. If one more person tells Scorpius his father is sleeping, something is going to break and it won’t be the crystal.” Hermione took the handkerchief Andromeda offered her. 

Andromeda took her hands and looked her in the eyes. “Believe me, I get it. But you are strong, Hermione. You may not feel very strong today, and who would after what you’ve been through? You are so strong. You go out there and you tell everyone what you’re going to do and what they’re going to do and if they don’t like it, too damn bad. You and your children are the only people you should be worrying about right now. _That’s_ the only “rule” you have to live by. Keep that thought close to your heart right now and you will get through this.”

“Thank you, Andromeda. I actually do feel a little better. For the moment anyway.” Hermione stood up and straightened out her black suit and checked her hair in the mirror.

“One day, one step, one moment at a time, my dear. One moment at a time.” 

***

After Hermione politely kicked everyone out, she did what she wanted to do all along. She gathered up Callie and Scorpius and they crawled into bed together.

“Where’s Daddy?” Callie looked around the room.

“Oh, Callie…” Hermione choked down a sob.

“He’s not here, Callie. He’s not going to be here.” Scorpius took Callie’s hand in his. “But I’m here. I’ll always be here for you.”

Hermione almost couldn’t breathe. _Where did her son come from? The angels?_ He must have.

_December 2010_

“Come on, Callie. We have to decorate the tree!” Scorpius was so excited he could hardly stand it. This was the first year he’d been allowed to help with anything but the bottom branches. Those were Callie’s domain now.

“Hang on, guys! The elves don’t have all the boxes out yet.” Hermione tried to wrangle them into the kitchen. “Let’s have a snack and by then it will be all ready for us to get to work.”

They begrudgingly agreed. As they were eating milk and cookies, Scorpius looked up thoughtfully.

Hermione noticed and said, “What’s going on inside that beautiful blond head of yours, sweetheart? I can almost see the wheels turning.” She chuckled. She could always tell when he was going to make some pronouncement or ask a question she most likely didn’t know the answer to.

“Who is going to put the star on the top of the tree this year? You know, since Daddy….” his voice trailed off and he looked down at his plate.

Hermione’s heart broke a little. “Well, he always said it should be whoever can reach the farthest.”

“So… that would be you, right?”

 _What would Draco say? Please, love, help me out here._ “Well, I’m really not tall enough to reach it, sweetie.”

“So does that mean we need to call someone to come and do it? Uncle Harry?” Scorpius wasn’t sure if he liked that idea. He loved Uncle Harry, but he wasn’t… well he just wasn’t their family.

“I think I have an idea. But we’ll have to wait until we’re almost done. Is that all right?” Hermione looked for Scorpius’ approval.

“OK, I guess so. Can we start now?” He had bounced back to being the boy who couldn’t stop moving.

“I think they should be ready for us. Let’s clean up in here first.” They took their dishes and glasses to the sink and then went to the living room.

The tree was up and sparkling with green, red and white fairy lights. Hermione had long ago given up control of the lights on the tree to the elves who always strung them perfectly. It was a gift.

She watched for a minute while the children worked on the tree. Callie had all the unbreakable ornaments, mostly Hermione’s from her childhood. She plopped down on the floor and started to hang them all on two branches. Hermione looked down at her and silently laughed. _It’s a universal truth,l every child has to do this._ She would fix them later, so she let her keep going. As she marveled over her daughter’s single-minded dedication, she felt for her necklace and drew comfort from it.

Scorpius worked on the middle branches hanging a few of Draco’s classic ornaments plus new ones Hermione had collected over the years. She marveled at how thoughtful and careful he was with each ornament he hung up. _He’s growing up so fast. Draco would be so proud of him; the way he helps with Callie and how he always seems to know if I’m having a rough day._

When they had found every empty branch, every hole that needed to be filled, and Hermione had stood back and inspected it for gaps, she declared it ready for the star.

“How are we going to do this, Mummy?” Scorpius didn’t forget she had said she had an idea.

“Well, baby, bring me the star and come here.” He brought it over to her. She took it and then reached down and lifted him up high in her arms. She handed him the star.

“You are the man of the house, now, Scorpius. You have the privilege of placing the star.”

He looked at Hermione like she had gifted him with the most precious job of all. Very carefully, he leaned towards the tree and, trusting that she had him securely in her grasp, he reached for the top branch and set the star on it. Hermione wandlessly did a little sticking charm and he took his hand away. He looked at her for approval and saw the tears in her eyes.

“Mummy, don’t be sad. Daddy wouldn’t want you to be.” He gave her a hug before she set him back down on the ground. She knelt and held his face in her hands.

“Oh, Scorpius I’m not sad. I’m just so proud of you. You are still and will always be my little boy, but today you showed me what kind of man you will become.” She gathered him up in a tight hug that he returned with gusto. “Which reminds me…I have something for you.”

“What is it? A present? Already?” His eyes darted around the room trying to see if there was something out of place that might qualify. Giving was better than receiving, but Scorpius never forgot about the receiving part.

“Well, kind of. It’s not something you can play with. Here, let me find it.” Hermione reached into the box she knew it was in and pulled out a small object wrapped in tissue paper. “If you are very gentle, you can unwrap it.” 

Scorpius took it from her and pulled off the paper. “A snow globe?” For a brief moment, he looked disappointed. But then he brightened when he saw what it was. “Is it….is it Hogwarts?”

“Yes, honey, it is Hogwarts. Wind it up and shake it.” He gently turned it over.

“Wait a minute it says something on the bottom.” He leaned over to try and read it. “Can you read it to me? It’s too small.”

Hermione blinked a couple of times, pretending to focus to hide her wet eyes. She knew it by heart of course.

“It says, ‘Scorpius, soon this will be another place to call home. Love, Daddy.” Scorpius looked at it in complete and utter awe. “I get to go when I’m 11, right?” Hermione nodded.

“This belonged to your father. It was a gift from his mum. He lost track of it for a while and we found it when we first got together. When you were born, Daddy changed the engraving so it would be to you from him. You were meant to get it when you turned six, but well, things were a little upside down then.”

“I think this is the best time to get it. I mean it is Christmas.” Scorpius looked at the inscription again, as if he was memorizing it. “Thank you, Mummy. Where should we put it?”

“Well, we always kept it on the mantel. But you can put it anywhere you would like. Do you see a good spot?”

Scorpius looked around. “If we put it on the mantel, we can see it from every part of the house.” He handed Hermione the snow globe and she placed it on the mantel. After she set it down, it seemed to glow just a bit and then went back to normal. Scorpius and Hermione exchanged glances.

Scorpius whispered, “You saw that, too didn’t you?” Hermione nodded, unable to speak. “I think he’s here with us right now.” Scorpius took her hand and rubbed his cheek on her palm. She stifled a sob and pulled him into her arms.

“Yes, my darling boy, he’s always here.”

**Author's Note:**

> So, before anyone comes at me about Hermione drinking champagne while pregnant, I realized I had to include her drinking a tiny bit or else Draco would have completely guessed. I had not one but two gin and tonics the night before I did my pregnancy test for my oldest daughter. She's almost 22 and seems to have dodged any bullets those drinks might have shot her way.
> 
> So many things tie in to this story that I am just now recognizing was a catharsis for me in a way.
> 
> My mother died last year (in September) and just a couple of days ago I discovered a tub of Christmas ornaments that she had brought with her when she moved in with me in 2016. We had never opened it. When I did, I found all kinds of treasures from when I was a child. I'm sure that was in the back of my mind while I was writing this.
> 
> I had a miscarriage in December of 1997 and heard all of the platitudes that Andromeda tells Hermione about. My oldest daughter is my "rainbow baby."
> 
> And finally, 30 years ago tonight, my aunt died from a cerebral hemorrhage at the age of 46. I'm sure that partially played into my decision to have Draco die from an aneurysm. 
> 
> Now that I've unpacked all that baggage, I hope you enjoy this story. Merry Christmas!


End file.
